Steph is in class now. I received the call, and the agent and I have set up a meeting time. Things are happening. How do I tell Steph the wonderful news?
It’s 5:30ish, she’s in class until 7:30, I’ve got time. I’ll map out the plan and make it perfect. How often does the man get to break the news that we might be parents! The phone rings. It’s Steph.
“I’m done with class early today, should I pick up dinner on the way home?”
Sure, and by the way we have a baby on the way. Hmm, maybe not the best way. I tell her to pick me up. I can tell her in the car. Maybe I should drive? No, I have the sheet of details, I shouldn’t read and drive.
She picks me up, backs up, and starts to drive down the road (I waited until we were going forward, no need to freak her out mid backing out).
“[Our agent] called.”
A look of panic strikes her, and she presses the break.
“She has a birth mother that wants to meet us.”
No more panic, but she was processing this massive amount of input. This is the difference between her and I. I’m thinking about Sunday, making sure that our schedules are clear and that we don’t get lost on our way there. She’s figuring out college funds, seperating a December birthday from Christmas, and whether Gweneth (again, note, not her real name) works as a middle name with our girl name, should the child be a girl.
“She has a two year old daughter”
“She has a December due date”
“She wants to meet on Sunday at noon, is that ok?”
The moment is so big that she only has one word left in her vocabulary.
I sit here now wondering if I should have done things different, but you can’t go back. Hindsight is 20/20. I could have told her to wait in the driveway while I told her the news, but isn’t the parked car the beginning of the baby process, not the middle?!
I wanted to tell her immediately, but I didn’t want her to be alone when processing it. I’m sure she can add to the moment from her point of view in a different post. What’s important now is that we both know.
What do we do now?
Note : This post was written on September 13th to be put up at a more appropriate future date.